By Edward Copeland
What makes a great movie monologue? Even more to the point, what qualifies as a monologue? Hamlet's soliloquy would certainly make the cut, but its origins didn't spring from film, so it's probably ineligible. Does a speech have to be a certain length to qualify as a monologue? Can it be addressed to someone who reacts or occasionally interjects something in the middle of the display?
When I first thought about tackling this topic for a 5 for the day, many came to mind that I wasn't certain would qualify. Does Bluto (John Belushi)'s speech in National Lampoon's Animal House rallying the Deltas asking "Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?" qualify since Otter and Boone (Tim Matheson, Peter Riegert) made frequent asides while he spoke? When Harry Lime (Orson Welles) talks about the Swiss in The Third Man or Bernstein (Everett Sloane) recalls the girl he saw once in Citizen Kane, since they occur in the confines of a conversation and are relatively short, should they count? For those reasons, those didn't make my final cut, nor did Robert Stack's "Have you ever been kicked -- in the head -- with an iron boot?" bit from Airplane! or Phoebe Cates' explanation of how she learned there was no Santa Claus in Gremlins. So here are the five I narrowed it down to -- feel free to choose whatever you think counts.
1. "Of course it's a friendly call." Bob Newhart made his comic reputation with his hilarious phone call routines, but none come close to touching the brilliance of Peter Sellers' President Merkin Muffley in Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb calling to tell the unseen Soviet premier Dmitri that some nukes have been sent toward his country by an insane American general. The movie almost consists of one gut-busting comic sequence after another, but Muffley's phone call could be the film's comic highlight and certainly belongs in the top tier of the great movie monologues.
2. "You have meddled with the primal forces of nature, Mr. Beale." You could really make a 5 for a Day (or even more) list of monologues entirely from Paddy Chayefsky script for his ever-more prophetic Network. Much of the movie consists of monologues -- from Peter Finch's much-lauded "mad as hell" speech to his less-often cited tale of a voice speaking to him in the night. William Holden gets his great exit slam on Faye Dunaway's Diana Christensen. Hell, Beatrice Straight won an Oscar for a monologue that is practically her entire appearance in the film, reacting to the news that Holden is leaving her. Still, for the purposes of this post, I'm going with Ned Beatty's great screed as Arthur Jensen (another essentially single-scene part that got an Oscar nomination) selling unhinged anchor Howard Beale on the pre-eminence of corporations over countries in this day and age -- a sentiment that seems even more true now than it did 30 years ago.
3. "I'll never put on a lifejacket again." For my money, Jaws remains Steven Spielberg's greatest film. It's essentially divided into two parts: the initial attacks and town reaction, and then what truly makes the film great -- three men on a rickety boat. The trio's search for the killer shark alternates between suspense and laughs, but for one scene it stops. Quint (Robert Shaw) and Hooper (Richard Dreyfuss) are sharing tales of how they got various wounds when Hooper asks about one of Quint's. The captain reveals it's a tattoo he had removed that once bore the name of the U.S.S. Indianapolis, the WWII ship he served on that was delivering the Hiroshima bomb but ended up sinking in shark-infested waters. Shaw is mesmerizing -- how he didn't get an Oscar nomination for this scene alone is beyond me.
4. "I'm tryin' real hard to be the shepherd." Part of me wanted to go with Christopher Walken's speech about the path a gold watch took to end up in young Butch's hands in Pulp Fiction, but with the many great words that Samuel L. Jackson brings to life from Quentin Tarantino's script, I couldn't ignore his closing speech as he holds his gun on would-be robber Tim Roth and explains why he isn't going to kill him and how his whole outlook on life has changed. Not only is it a great speech, and not only does Jackson give it the delivery it deserves, it's a summation of the entire film.
5. "Women. A mistake? Or did He DO IT TO US ON PURPOSE?" For my final pick, I have to choose a personal favorite of mine from a movie that admittedly isn't anywhere near the level of the first four on this list. The Witches of Eastwick is OK, and it bears little resemblance to the John Updike novel upon which it was based, but the whole exercise is almost worth it just to witness Jack Nicholson as the frazzled devil complaining to a church congregation about his female troubles. Nicholson has contributed countless great lines and speeches in many films throughout his career, many which probably deserve mention before this one, but I can't help it; it cracked me up in 1987, and it still makes me laugh just thinking about it today.
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Edward Copeland is a contributor to The House Next Door and the publisher of Edward Copeland on Film and the political blog Copeland Institute for Lower Learning.
Monday, October 23, 2006
5 for the Day: Monologues
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Okay, this is fudging a bit, since not every monologue mentioned below is delivered uninterrupted. (In one case, it's really more a scene dominated by one character than a start-to-finish declamation.) But for what it's worth:
1. In Persona, a nurse, Sister Alma (Bibi Andersson) telling her mute actress patient Elisabeth (Liv Ullmann) about the transformative sexual encounter she had with two young men while sunbathing in the nude. Ingmar Bergman and cinematographer Sven Nykvist photograph their precisely arranged faces to suggest how one woman's personality is melding into the other's.
2. Stanley Kramer's Judgment at Nuremberg contains a number of long, elaborate monologues -- Kramer was always a theatrically minded, didactic filmmaker -- but the most memorable, I think, comes from Burt Lancaster's defendant, Ernst Janning, as he confesses his role in aiding the Holocaust and implicates the rest of the world in Germany's guilt. It begins, "There was a fever over the land. A fever of disgrace, of indignity, of hunger. We had a democracy, yes, but it was torn by elements within. Above all, there was fear. Fear of today, fear of tomorrow, fear of our neighbors, and fear of ourselves. Only when you understand that - can you understand what Hitler meant to us. Because he said to us: 'Lift your heads! Be proud to be German! There are devils among us. Communists, Liberals, Jews, Gypsies! Once these devils will be destroyed, your misery will be destroyed.' It was the old, old story of the sacrifical lamb. What about those of us who knew better? We who knew the words were lies and worse than lies? Why did we sit silent? Why did we take part? Because we loved our country!"
3. Bonasera's opening monologue in The Godfather that begins, "I believe in America."
4. Maybe the very finest homage/ripoff/ reimagining of (3), Johnny Gaspar's opening monologue in Miller's Crossing. "...I'm talkin' about friendship. I'm talkin' about character. I'm talkin' about - hell, Leo, I ain't embarrassed to use the word - I'm talkin' about ethics."
5. Beatrice Straight in Network, already mentioned by Ed.
I am sure it doesn't meet Ed's stringent standards, but I consider Alec Baldwin's one-scene cameo in Glengarry Glen Ross a monologue, or close enough (he pretty much runs the room, smacking down anyone who dares interrupt). And Albert Brooks' desperate speech to wife Julie Hagerty in Lost in America about the importance of the nest egg.
#1 is so ex-video store clerk of me, but I can't help it.
1. "I've seen things you humans couldn't imagine. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. Sea beams glittering in the dusk near the Tannhauser gate. All these--moments--will be lost in time like tears in rain. Time to die." Blade Runner, of course.
2. The opening voiceover in Raising Arizona might not technically count because it's punctuated by dialogue scenes, but it feels all of a piece to me. I think it's one of the finest examples of voiceover ever, because it's a separate, discrete story element, instead of just being narration.
3. Judd Nelson in The Breakfast Club, chastising poor Molly Ringwald. "Stick your head in the sand and wait for prom." It's writing and a performance that tears right to the heart of what sensitive teenage girls want: a tough guy who calls you on your bull* and wants to kiss you anyway.
4. I am so in agreement over Persona. It's one of my favorite scenes in all Bergman.
5. I'm going to fudge the rules even further and ask that Liza Minnelli's performance of "Maybe This Time" in Cabaret be up for consideration. It's a stunning collision of story, mise-en-scene, and performance. There have been other great solo performances in films (particularly by Liza's mom), but I would call this one a monologue because its function in the story surpasses its performative aspects. In other words, it's Sally's song, not Liza's (even though Liza brings an added poignancy).
In case that one gets nixed:
6. Mrs. Danvers in Rebecca, convincing poor Joan Fontaine to dash her brains out on the rocks. It's a mesmerizingly creepy performance, pure Gothic pleasure.
Many of my choice have already been selected (Jaws, Persona) to which I'll add Tom Joad in The Grapes of Wrath ("Then it don't matter. I'll be all around in the dark - I'll be everywhere. Wherever you can look - wherever there's a fight, so hungry people can eat, I'll be there. Wherever there's a cop beatin' up a guy, I'll be there. I'll be in the way guys yell when they're mad. I'll be in the way kids laugh when they're hungry and they know supper's ready, and when the people are eatin' the stuff they raise and livin' in the houses they build - I'll be there, too.") and Rev. Harry Powell in The Night of the Hunter ("Ah, little lad, you're staring at my fingers. Would you like me to tell you the little story of right-hand/left-hand? The story of good and evil? H-A-T-E! It was with this left hand that old brother Cain struck the blow that laid his brother low. L-O-V-E! You see these fingers, dear hearts? These fingers has veins that run straight to the soul of man. The right hand, friends, the hand of love. Now watch, and I'll show you the story of life. Those fingers, dear hearts, is always a-warring and a-tugging, one agin t'other. Now watch 'em! Old brother left hand, left hand he's a fighting, and it looks like love's a goner. But wait a minute! Hot dog, love's a winning! Yessirree! It's love that's won, and old left hand hate is down for the count!"). Also Harry Lime in The Third Man (" Don't be so gloomy. After all it's not that awful. Like the fella says, in Italy for 30 years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love - they had 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock. So long Holly.") and Terry in On the Waterfront ("It wasn't him, Charley, it was you. Remember that night in the Garden you came down to my dressing room and you said, "Kid, this ain't your night. We're going for the price on Wilson." You remember that? "This ain't your night"! My night! I coulda taken Wilson apart! So what happens? He gets the title shot outdoors on the ballpark and what do I get? A one-way ticket to Palooka-ville! You was my brother, Charley, you shoulda looked out for me a little bit. You shoulda taken care of me just a little bit so I wouldn't have to take them dives for the short-end money... You don't understand. I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let's face it. It was you, Charley."). And lastly there's Isaac in Manhattan ("Why is life worth living? It's a very good question. Um... Well, There are certain things I guess that make it worthwhile. uh... Like what... okay... um... For me, uh... ooh... I would say... what, Groucho Marx, to name one thing... uh... um... and Wilie Mays... and um... the 2nd movement of the Jupiter Symphony... and um... Louis Armstrong, recording of Potato Head Blues... um... Swedish movies, naturally... Sentimental Education by Flaubert... uh... Marlon Brando, Frank Sinatra... um... those incredible Apples and Pears by Cezanne... uh... the crabs at Sam Wo's... uh... Tracy's face...")
I had considered Baldwin's scene in Glengarry Glen Ross.
Annie--The inclusion of Liza's "Maybe This Time" is definitely a rule-bender, but I can see how you could make a case for it -- particularly in that movie, which makes a point of separating the cabaret performances from the "Real Life" scenes, yet integrates them through editing so that they seem to flow into each other anyway.
Love that Roy Baty speech. Though considering he knows his time on earth is limited, you'd think he'd have run in the other direction when Rick Deckard came knocking, and gotten himself laid or gone to a casino or something instead of going mano-a-mano. But to quote Paul Simon, that's why God made the movies.
In the immediate:
1) Ian Holm's monologue from The Sweet Hereafter where he talks about nearly performing a tracheotomy.
2) Nancy Allen's "then we can get back to the mindfuck" monologue from Dressed to Kill
3) Rebecca Romijn's striptease in Femme Fatale: why can't monologues be purely physical? :-)
4) Walken's dinner table speech to Di Caprio in Catch Me If You Can
5) Laura Dern's multi-layered confessional, spread throughout Inland Empire (a review of which I'll publish on this site sometime soon).
You've seen Inland Empire already. I'm jealous.
As well you should be, Edward. ;-)
Only to say that it's fuckin' incredible.
Second Blade Runner and third Persona--in fact, all of the lists so far strike me as damn near definitive. I'm also partial to:
1. Naked
Johnny's spectacularly pessimistic speech to Brian the security guard: "You can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. And humanity is just a cracked egg. And the omelette stinks."
2. Seconds
I've cited this scene in these parts before: Rock Hudson's lovely epiphany upon returning to the "Seconds" lab. They put him down like Old Yeller in response.
3. Shadow of a Doubt
"The world is a foul sty, young Charlie."
4. Kill Bill, Vol. 2
The famed Clark Kent/Superman speech, which was purportedly written on the spot. It's great music, this, and I saw it referenced in a handful of Superman Returns reviews. Perhaps one test of a great monologue is whether the ideas it presents are eventually co-opted by the popular culture.
5. Barton Fink
Charlie Meadows' confession amidst a blazing inferno, over the course of which his affable veneer melts away like wax. That awards season? John Goodman was denied, man.
In addition to Network and Jaws (I liked Matt's mention of the nestegg rant in Lost in America, too) how about Bill Murray's mutt speech in Stripes? And someone should mention the opening of Patton. Expanding the rules a bit, I'd toss in Conway Twill in Dead Man - from about 10 minutes into the movie til he's off screen with Cole. That's sort of a rolling monologue that goes throughout the movie.
Mifune in Seven Samurai.
Two by Christopher Walken:
The "driving in the rain" monologue to Woody Allen in ANNIE HALL.
And the "Hello, little man" do-you-know-where-I-kept-this-watch soliloquy in PULP FICTION.
Others I love:
Warren Beatty's "I fucked 'em all" explanation to Goldie Hawn in SHAMPOO.
Martin Sheen's "Saigon. Shit" voiceover in APOCALYPSE NOW.
Charlie Chaplin's closing speech railing against "machine men with machine hearts" in THE GREAT DICTATOR.
Kurt Russell's explanation to Michelle Pfeiffer about the differences between a cop and a con in TEQUILA SUNRISE.
And speaking of La Pfeiffer, my favorite from THE FABULOUS BAKER BOYS:
Susie Diamond: "I know one thing. While Frank Baker was home putting his kids to sleep last night, little brother Jack was out dusting off his dreams for a few minutes. I was there. I saw it in your face. You're full of shit. You're a fake. Every time you walk into some shitty daiquiri hut, you're selling yourself on the cheap. Hey, I know all about that. I'd find myself at the end of the night with some creep and tell myself it didn't matter. And you kid yourself that you've got this empty place inside where you can put it all. But you do it long enough and all you are is empty."
Jack Baker: "I didn't know whores were so philosophical."
Susie Diamond: "At least my brother's not my pimp. You know, I had you pegged for a loser the first time I saw you, but I was wrong. You're worse. You're a coward."
Monologue fever: Catch it! Over at Bright Lights Film Journal, C. Jerry Kutner offers three of his favorites.
I assume that anon is talking about Kikuchiyo's revelatory speech about how farmer's always cheat and lie made all the more powerful by the revelation that he is the son of a farmer ("What do you think of farmers? You think they're saints? Hah! They're foxy beasts! They say, "We've got no rice, we've no wheat. We've got nothing!" But they have! They have everything! Dig under the floors! Or search the barns! You'll find plenty! Beans, salt, rice, sake! Look in the valleys, they've got hidden warehouses! They pose as saints but are full of lies! If they smell a battle, they hunt the defeated! They're nothing but stingy, greedy, blubbering, foxy, and mean! God damn it all! But then who made them such beasts? You did! You samurai did it! You burn their villages! Destroy their farms! Steal their food! Force them to labour! Take their women! And kill them if they resist! So what should farmers do?")
If so, hell yeah, great speech, beautifully rendered.
I'll echo the previous citations of The Godfather's Bonasera, Glengarry's Baldwin, and Pulp Fiction's marvelous Captain Koons.
Despite the subsequent massive overexposure of all things Austin Powers, Dr. Evil's visit to family therapy in the first film absolutely slays me to this day. "My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery..."
I'm also fond of the incendiary screed Edward Norton delivers to his own reflection in the underrated 25th Hour. Spike Lee's definitely trafficked in this area before, but Norton's intensity and gradual resignation make it something to behold.
Interesting how often Walken's name pops up whenever great verbal solos are discussed. To THR-HB's two, I'd add Walken's "Let me tell you a little story about my father" in Paul Schrader's underrated "The Comfort of Strangers."
Vic: Is that the same monologue where Dr. Evil reveals that in the summer, "we wore helmets made out of meat"?
John Glover narrating Roy Scheider's home movies in 52 Pick-Up.
Theresa Russell on the stand in Eureka.
Idi Amin dresses down his Cabinet in General Idi Amin Dada.
Billy Crudup ruins dinner in Waking the Dead.
Philip Baker Hall as Richard Nixon in Secret Honor.
Also interesting how often the Coen Brothers have come up--Barton Fink, Miller's Crossing, Raising Arizona.
What about the monologues in Sam Fuller's Shock Corridor? The one by the black man who wants to be in the Klan makes me weep.
Matt: You betcha. "My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds -- pretty standard, really."
Jason Robards may have a few interjections in the course of the speech, but I'd nominate Mr. Dark (Jonathan Pryce) and his recounting of the ages of a man's life in Something Wicked This Way Comes. Grandly theatrical stuff delivered in a grandly theatrical manner.
How could I have forgotten the philosophy of Kevin Costner's Crash Davis in BULL DURHAM:
"Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days."
I also like his description of being called up to the majors:
"Yeah, I was in the show. I was in the show for 21 days once - the 21 greatest days of my life. You know, you never handle your luggage in the show, somebody else carries your bags. It was great. You hit white balls for batting practice, the ballparks are like cathedrals, the hotels all have room service, and the women all have long legs and brains."
Shrevie's rant at Beth about not touching his records in "Diner." It's comparatively short, but Stern does a good job with communicating the distance between the meltdown he's having and the meltdown he should be having.
I'm surprised there has yet to be a mention of the monologue poured out by Donald Sutherland in "JFK" (which I suppose in some respects isn't a monologue but rather a voiceover).
Let me second Crash Davis' manifesto from "Bull Durham". I always find the line about believing Oswald acted alone ironic considerring Kostner's role in "JFK".
I'm suprised no one has mentioned Dennis Hopper's Sicilian history lesson from "True Romance". It's one of my favorite scenes in any movie (also a rare instance where someone steals a scene from Christopher Walken.)
I also submit Bill Murray's tale of the Dali Lama's golf game ("Big hitter, the Lama. Long".
And at the risk of getting too "cult"-y, how about Avatar's speech towards the end of "Wizards", right before he kills his brother, Blackwolf (...oh yeah, one last thing...I'm glad you changed your last name, you son of a..."
Several great ones already here of course: I'm partial to Miller's Crossing in particular, as well as Blade Runner, Apocalypse Now, and Austin Powers. Some of my other favorites:
1. F. Murray Abraham has a number of choice monologues in Amadeus (which maybe shouldn't count, due to it being a Shaffer play, but somebody else mentioned Tom Joad). If I had to pick my favorite, it'd be either his disquisition on Don Giovanni ("And now, the Madness began in me. The Madness of a man spltting in half...") or this, on Mozart's "Serenade for Thirteen Winds": "On the page it looked nothing. The beginning simple, almost comic. Just a pulse - bassoons and basset horns - like a rusty squeezebox. Then suddenly - high above it - an oboe, a single note, hanging there unwavering, till a clarinet took over and sweetened it into a phrase of such delight! This was no composition by a performing monkey! This was a music I'd never heard. Filled with such longing, such unfulfillable longing. It seemed to me that I was hearing the voice of God."
2. A sentimental favorite, which is also not quite fair because it's cribbing heavily from Tolkien, but Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings films have several memorable monologues. To keep it short here, I'll go with two -- both voiceovers, which may also not count:
2a. Galadriel (Cate Blanchett)'s magically melancholy opening prologue at the beginning of The Fellowship of the Ring: "Darkness crept back into the forests of the world. Rumor grew of a shadow in the East, whispers of a nameless fear, and the Ring of Power perceived. Its time had now come."
2b. Elrond (Hugo Weaving)'s similarly memorable flash-forward to the final fate of Aragorn and Arwen, in the middle of The Two Towers (Yes, it's verbatim Tolkien, but it's excellently performed): "He will come to death. An image of the splendor of the kings of men, in glory undimmed before the breaking of the world. But you, my daughter, you will linger on in darkness and in doubt, as nightfall in winter that comes without a star."
3. Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) at the very end of Annie Hall, summing up the score for way too many of us: "After that, it got pretty late and we both had to go, but it was great seeing Annie again and I realized what a terrific person she was and how much fun it was just knowing her, and I thought of that old joke, you know, the, this, this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, 'Doc, uh, my brother's crazy, he thinks he's a chicken,' and uh, the doctor says, 'Well why don't you turn him in?' And the guy says, 'I would, but I need the eggs.' Well, I guess that's pretty much now how I feel about relationships. You know, they're totally irrational and crazy and absurd and - but uh, I guess we keep going through it...because...most of us need the eggs"
4. The five top Coen brother monologues should probably be its own question. My far-and-away favorite of their flicks is Miller's Crossing...Matt's already mentioned Johnny Gaspar's opening, but you could also make a case for either of Bernie Birnbaum (John Turturro)'s big moments, at Miller's Crossing ("Look into your heart") or back at Tom's place later.("I guess you didn't see the play you gave me.") That being said, since Miller's already noted, I'm going Lebowski:
4a. The Dude stalls for time: "I'll tell you what I'm blathering about... I've got information man! New shit has come to light! And shit... man, she kidnapped herself. Well sure, man. Look at it... a young trophy wife, in the parlance of our times, you know, and she, uh, uh, owes money all over town, including to known pornographers, and that's cool... that's, that's cool, I'm, I'm saying, she needs money, man."
4b. Walter's eulogy: "Donny was a good bowler, and a good man. He was one of us. He was a man who loved the outdoors... and bowling, and as a surfer he explored the beaches of Southern California, from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo and... up to... Pismo. He died, like so many young men of his generation, he died before his time. In your wisdom, Lord, you took him, as you took so many bright flowering young men at Khe Sanh, at Langdok, at Hill 364. These young men gave their lives. And so would Donny. Donny, who loved bowling. And so, Theodore Donald Karabotsos, in accordance with what we think your dying wishes might well have been, we commit your final mortal remains to the bosom of the Pacific Ocean, which you loved so well. Good night, sweet prince."
5. And, since I just put it in a primary source reader I'm putting together for an American history textbook, here's Gordon Gekko in Wall Street: "The point is, ladies and gentleman, that greed -- for lack of a better word -- is good. Greed is right. Greed works. Greed clarifies, cuts through, and captures the essence of the evolutionary spirit."
Also, Straitharn-channeling-Murrow in Good Night and Good Luck. Walken's on the other side of a pretty memorable monologue with Dennis Hopper in True Romance. And I'm surprised nobody's mentioned George C. Scott in Patton or Nicholson's famous screed in A Few Good Men.
I haven't seen it in a while, but does Albert Brooks' ode to his record collection in "Modern Romance" count as a monologue? And my favorite speech in Miller's Crossing belongs to the Dane: "...like some goddamn Bolshevik getting his orders from yeg central. Up is down. Black is white. We'll go out to Miller's crossing and see who's so goddamn smart." Or something like that. I quote from memory. Also, I looked up the Bull Durham script and realized that Shelton originally had Crash talking about Pynchon, not Sontag.
Re: Bull Durham, Crash Davis' manifesto is good, but better is Annie Savoy's opening monologue: "I believe in the church of baseball. I've tried all the major religions, and most of the minor ones..." It's both a great introduction to the film to come and a complete piece in itself. I'm not even a sports fan, and that one gets me every time.
Lots of greats already posted (BLADE RUNNER, JAWS, STRANGELOVE, etc.) here are three more that stand out for me:
1. From THE LOST WEEKEND (might not qualify, but enough lit adaptations have already been mentioned), Don Birnam (Ray Milland) salutes the sauce:
"It shrinks my liver, doesn't it, Nat? It pickles my kidneys, yeah. But what it does to the mind? It tosses the sandbags overboard so the balloon can soar. Suddenly I'm above the ordinary. I'm competent. I'm walking a tightrope over Niagara Falls. I'm one of the great ones. I'm Michaelangelo, molding the beard of Moses. I'm Van Gogh painting pure sunlight. I'm Horowitz, playing the Emperor Concerto. I'm John Barrymore before movies got him by the throat. I'm Jesse James and his two brothers, all three of them. I'm W. Shakespeare. And out there it's not Third Avenue any longer, it's the Nile. Nat, it's the Nile and down it moves the barge of Cleopatra."
2. From CHASING AMY, Holden (Ben Affleck) pours his heart out:
"I love you. And not, not in a friendly way, although I think we're great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy-dog way, although I'm sure that's what you'll call it. I love you. Very, very simple, very truly. You are the epitome of everything I have ever looked for in another human being. And I know that you think of me as just a friend, and crossing that line is the furthest thing from an option you would ever consider. But I had to say it. I just, I can't take this anymore. I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can't, I can't look into your eyes without feeling that, that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are. And I know this will probably queer our friendship - no pun intended - but I had to say it, because I've never felt this way before, and I don't care. I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this to light means we can't hang out anymore, then that hurts me. But God, I just, I couldn't allow another day to go by without just getting it out there, regardless of the outcome, which by the look on your face is to be the inevitable shoot-down. And, you know, I'll accept that. But I know... I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there is a moment of hesitation, then that means you feel something too. All I ask, please, is that you just, you just not dismiss that - and try to dwell in it for just ten seconds. Alyssa, there isn't another soul on this fucking planet who has ever made me half the person I am when I'm with you, and I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next plateau. Because it is there between you and me. You can't deny that. Even if, you know, even if we never talk again after tonight, please know that I'm forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me, which - while I do appreciate it - I'd never need a painting of birds bought at a diner to remind me of."
3. From THE DEVIL'S ADVOCATE, Kevin Lomax (Keanu Reeves) gets an earful from "John Milton" (Al Pacino):
"Let me give you a little inside information about God. God likes to watch. He's a prankster. Think about it. He gives man instincts. He gives you this extraordinary gift, and then what does He do, I swear for His own amusement, his own private, cosmic gag reel, He sets the rules in opposition. It's the goof of all time. Look but don't touch. Touch, but don't taste. Taste, don't swallow. Ahaha. And while you're jumpin' from one foot to the next, what is he doing? He's laughin' His sick, fuckin' ass off! He's a tight-ass! He's a SADIST! He's an absentee landlord! Worship that? NEVER!"
Most things I would have offered have already been covered -- Goodman's eulogy in Lebowski and his confession in Barton Fink are great. But speaking of confessions...
Hans Beckert (Peter Lorre) in _M_: "I have no control over this. This evil thing inside me, the fire, the voices, the torment! " I'm surprised this one didn't appear earlier. So sympathetic and disgusting at the same time.
But other than this significant omission, let me offer some sentimental favorites:
Blume (Bill Murray) in _Rushmore_:"...[H]ere's my advice to the rest of you: Take dead aim on the rich boys. Get them in the crosshairs and take them down. Just remember, they can buy anything but they can't buy backbone. Don't let them forget it." Every private school should have someone give this speech. Also, from what I have heard in interviews with Murray, he pretty much feels this way about his own (rich) kids.
Two possibly-too-short ones:
Maria (Natalie Wood) in _West Side Story_: "How many -- and still have one bullet left for me?"
Luke (Paul Newman) in _Cool Hand Luke_: "Hey old man, you home tonight?" Technically a dialogue with God.
Two blasts from the 80s:
Casey (Drew Barrymore) in _Irreconcilable Differences_: "And I think if you have a child, you should treat that child like a human being and not like a pet." I have not seen this movie in many years, so someone can tell me if this scene is too cloying. I mostly recall Drew Barrymore's impassive face. I must say, even now, Barrymore's preternatural presence as a child actor does not creep me out (unlike Macauley Culkin, Haley Joel Osment, and the nightmare inducing Dakota Fanning). I can't really explain why.
And finally, for folks of a certain age, Ronald Miller (Patrick Dempsey) in _Can't Buy Me Love_:
"You broke your arm once before, remember? You fell out of our tree house. Kenneth picked you up...and we carried you 12 blocks to the hospital." Anybody can go with Brian's (Anthony Michael Hall's) closer in _The Breakfast Club_, but I like this Ronald's monologue better. He's also wielding a bat when he gives it, so extra points for that.
Anon
Incidentally, for those intrigued by annie frisbie's comment, clips from all of the _Shock Corridor_ monologues, including the "Trent" monologue she specifically refers to, are all on YouTube.
Anon
Excellent choices all around. A few favorites that haven’t popped up yet; since Edward’s generously allowed us not to follow the stringent guidelines he held himself to, I’m cheating all over the place, counting as monologues scenes with interlocutors, cutaways, voiceovers, even a joke. To my mind, all qualify as monologues where it counts: their focus on the voice in the dark pretending to reach out to an audience, but really justifying itself to itself.
2001: “I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission.” My favorite Kubrick monologue, wickedly hilarious when HAL calmly suggests a stress pill, weirdly heartbreaking as the evolution strip is run backwards, and the measured BBC-ready tones of HAL warble and slow. For an artist as intellectual as Kubrick, it exemplifies what must have been the ultimate horror: “Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it.”
PSYCHO: “I hope they are watching. They'll see. They'll see and they'll know, and they'll say, ‘Why, she wouldn't even harm a fly...’” After Simon Oakland’s psychiatrist stops the movie dead to offer a rational, manageable explanation for everything that proceeded, we return to isolation, delusion, and madness, and any comfort we took from the good doctor gets drowned in the swamp. All credit to Paul Jasmin’s excellent line reading, though the kicker remains how Perkins’s frail immobility gives way to flash that wicked smile.
KING OF COMEDY: “There are wonderful pressures that make every day a glowing, radiant day in your life.” Jerry Langford’s shining moment. Maybe it starts off as a dodge to keep on his kidnapper’s good side, but it ends with bitter acknowledgement of a daily grind that makes the two jerks holding a gun on him seem the slightest of his problems. Lewis delivers this without grandstanding, just the glum, authentic sag of experience.
STALKER: “He found a pile of money on his table.” Or words to that effect, as I couldn’t hunt down a source. Regardless, the gist is enough, for this is one example where the story matters more than the telling. For such a confusing, deliberately inscrutable movie, Tarkovsky gives the upfront warning the clarity of a fable: You’ll get your heart’s desire in the Zone, so be very sure you can face up to what that is. Maybe Tarkovsky and his fellow screenwriters should have heeded themselves more, as frankly most of the rest of the film’s dialogue (at least in translation) strikes me as laughably pretentious. Good thing there’s not too much of it for the next three hours.
THE ARTISTOCRATS: “That sounds terrible. I kind of want to see it.” Steven Wright, transforming a dirty joke into a Beckettian riff on THE SHINING, family dynamic (no sex here, just bloody beatings with baseball bats) and all.
Alec Baldwin's speech in Glengarry Glen Ross was great and, reportedly, written just for him by Mamet. However, I feel that Al Pacino's seductive selling pitch is superior just for the opening line: "All train compartments smell vaguely of sh*t." Or words to that effect. What follows then is a great monologue about (a)morality, which is still one of the best pieces of modern writing around.
My own favourite one is Charles Laughton's courtroom speech(es) in Jean Renoir's "This Land is Mine" (not to mention his equally fine last scene in the classroom).
But then Laughton delivered speeches and tirades in inimitable manner: monologues in "Island of Lost Souls", "Rembrandt", "Advise and consent"or "Witness for the Prosecution" come readily to mind... And among the surviving material of the ill-fated "I Claudius" there's Claudius' magnificent address to the senate
Two wildly different monologues: Scout Finch's voice-over at the end of "To Kill a Mockingbird," after dropping off Boo Radley at home, which is simple and poignant and beautiful and sums up the most important theme of the film -- tolerance -- with the following lines: "One time Atticus said you never really knew a man until you stood in his shoes and walked around in them. Just standing on the Radley porch was enough." And Sam Spade's explanation to Brigid O'Shaughnessy as he hands her over to the police at the end of "The Maltese Falcon," which begins on a note of principle ("When a man's partner is killed, he's supposed to do something"), turns mercilessly hardboiled ("I'll have some rotten nights after I've sent you over, but that'll pass"), and ends as a chilling expression of self-sacrifice and vengeance ("I won't, because all of me wants to regardless of consequences and because you've counted on it the same as you counted on it with all the others.").
I remember being blown away by Jack Lemmon's monologue in Short Cuts, explaining how he fell -quite accidently, of course! - into an affair that altered the course of his life.
Another favorite is Jack Nicholson's brief, wonderful swan dive COMPLETELY over the edge in The Shining (to Shelly Duvall, on the stairs, bat in hand).
Actually, I haven't seen it in a while, but I think he delivers the whole thing uninterrupted, doesn't he? hmmm. Perhaps I should've done a little research first...
I will always have a soft spot for Alec Baldwin turning what could have passed as a parody of an overwritten monologue fromn Harold Becker's MALICE (who wrote that, Sorkin?) into something that approached the sublime.
Did we overlook Mitchum's love and hate monologue from Night of the Hunter? I'll pick that, and also any monologue from Groucho Marx or Gene Wilder.
Here's a nifty website http://www.whysanity.net/monos/
for people like me who want to cheat. I would never have thought of Hal's speech in 2001. Also, there are a ton of Nicholson entries. Man, Jack monologues more than a James Bond villain.
Wagstaff: Actually, Dan Jardine mentioned Night of the Hunter further up in the thread. But for variety's sake, here's Radio Raheem riffing on the same monologue in Do the Right Thing:
"Let me tell you the story of "Right Hand, Left Hand." It's a tale of good and evil. Hate: It was with this hand that Cane iced his brother. Love: These five fingers, they go straight to the soul of man. The right hand: the hand of love. The story of life is this: Static. One hand is always fighting the other hand; and the left hand is kicking much ass. I mean, it looks like the right hand, Love, is finished. But, hold on, stop the presses, the right hand is coming back. Yeah, he got the left hand on the ropes, now, that's right. Ooh, it's the devastating right and Hate is hurt, he's down. Left-Hand Hate K.O.ed by Love."
In both movies, I love the idea of Love demonstrating its superiority over Hate by beating the living shit out of it.
Muscular Christianity placed in a Manichaean universe.
The ironic perversity of the speech coming out of the mouth of a man as evil as Mitchum's "reverend" is also a large part of the appeal of that particular speech.
Late to the party, as usual.
Just one for me: J.Patrick Shanley - Moonstruck. "We are here to ruin ourselves and break our hearts and love the wrong people..and DIE!"
And is it cheating if I include his Oscar acceptance speech? - "I want to thank everyone who ever punched or kissed me in my life and everyone I ever punched or kissed"
That Irish man rocks.
There's a little (DTV, I think) 2001 film called GANG TAPES that features a seven-minute monologue from a gang member named Cyril about the origins of his nickname. I only saw it once, years ago, but it stuck with me.
Also, the Brian Cox voiceover that closes 25TH HOUR: "...you tell them the whole story. Then you ask them if they know how lucky they are to be there. It all came so close to never happening. This life came so close to never happening."
Both GLENGARRY monologues are great, but Pacino's is some of his best work as he seduces Jonathan Pryce into buying worthless land:
"Stocks, bonds, objects of art, real estate, what are they? An opportunity. To what, to make money? Perhaps. To lose money? Perhaps. To indulge and to learn about ourselves? Perhaps. So fuckin' what, what isn't? They're an opportunity. That's all they are, they're an event. A guy comes to you, you make a call, you send in a card, "I have these properties I would like for you to see." What does this mean? What do you want it to mean? Do you see what I'm saying? Things happen to you. Glad I met you. I'm glad I met you, James. I want to show you something. It may mean something to you, it may not, I don't know. I don't know anymore. What is that? Florida. Glengarry Highlands. Florida. Bullshit, and maybe that's true, and that's what I said, but look at this. What is this? This is a piece of land. Listen to what I'm gonna tell you now..."
So much ground ha been covered, I just want to include two great documentary monologues:
The classic monologue at the center of Errol Morris's Gates of Heaven in which the old lady describes her loneliness and bitterness, oblivious to how much of herself she is revealing to Morris's camera.
And the climactic monologue of Werner Herzog's Grizzly Man, the one where Timothy Treadwell rants against the poachers and the Parks Service who don't protect his beloved bears.
Oh, and no list of monologues would be complete without mention of these words spoken by Bela Lugosi in Edward D. Wood Jr.'s immortal Bride of the Monster (and repeated by Martin Landau):
"Home? I have no home. Hunted, despised, Living like an animal! The jungle is my home. But I will show the world that I can be its master! I will perfect my own race of people. A race of atomic supermen which will conquer the world!"
I'm still cracking up over Dr. Evil's speeh about helmets made of meat and luge lessons - I woke up this morning laughing about that....thanks, guys! (Pretty standard, really.)
I like Ed's choice of Jack's EASTWICK speech - I'd put that on about a week ago just to listen to that bit, too.
Surprised nobody's mentioned Eric Bogosian's rant from the end of TALK RADIO (it'd definitely occupy my #1 spot):
I'm here, I'm here every night, I come up here every night. This is my job, this is what I do for a living. I come up here and I do the best I can. I give you the best I can. I can't do better than this. I can't. I'm only a human being up here. I'm not God... uh...alot of you out there are not...I may not be the most popular guy in the world. That's not the point. I really don't care what you think about me. I mean, who the hell are you anyway? You..."the audience"... you call me up and you try to tell me things about myself...you don't know me. You don't know anything about me. You've never seen me. You don't know what I look like. You don't know who I am, what I want, what I like, what I don't like in this world. I'm just a voice. A voice in the wilderness ...And you, like a pack of wolves descend on me, 'cause you can't stand facing what it is you are and what you've made...Yes, the world is a terrible place! Yes, cancer and garbage disposals will get you! Yes, a war is coming. Yes, the world is shot to hell and you're all goners.
Everything's screwed up and you like it that way, don't you? You're fascinated by the gory details. You're mesmerized by your own fear! You revel in floods and car accidents and unstoppable diseases....You're happiest when others are in pain!
And that's where I come in, isn't it? I'm here to lead you by the hand through the dark forest of your own hatred and anger and humiliation. I'm providing a public service. You're so scared! You're like the little child under the covers. You're afraid of the bogeyman, but you can't live without him. Your fear, your own lives have become entertainment! Tomorrow night, millions of people are going to be listening to this show, and you have nothing to talk about.
Marvelous technology is at our disposal and instead of reaching up for new heights, we try to see how far down we can go...how deep into the muck we can immerse ourselves!
What do you want to talk about? Baseball scores? Your pet? Orgasms? You're pathetic. I despise each and every one of you. You've got nothing, absolutely nothing. No brains, no power, no future. No hope. No God.
The only thing you believe in is me. What are you if you don't have me? I'm not afraid, see? I come up here every night and I make my case, I make my point. I say what I believe in. I have to, I have no choice. You frighten me. I come up her every night and I tear into you, I abuse you, I insult you...and you just keep calling.
Why do you keep coming back? What's wrong with you? I don't want to hear any more, I've had enough. Stop talking. Don't call anymore. Go away.
Bunch of yellow-bellied, spineless, bigoted, quivering, drunken, insomniatic, paranoid, disgusting, perverted, voyeuristic little obscene phone callers. That's what you are. Well, to hell with ya.
I don't need your fear or your stupidity. You don't get it. It's wasted on you. Pearls before swine.
If one person out there had any idea what I was talking about...(starts taking callers again) Fred, you're on!
Also, V's monologue on V-TV IN V FOR VENDETTA really gets my juices pumping...)
ANY GIVEN SUNDAY: "You find out life's this game of inches, so is football. Because in either game - life or football - the margin for error is so small. I mean, one half a step too late or too early and you don't quite make it. One half second too slow, too fast and you don't quite catch it. The inches we need are everywhere around us. They're in every break of the game, every minute, every second. On this team we fight for that inch. On this team we tear ourselves and everyone else around us to pieces for that inch. We claw with our fingernails for that inch. Because we know when add up all those inches, that's gonna make the fucking difference between winning and losing! Between living and dying! I'll tell you this, in any fight it's the guy whose willing to die whose gonna win that inch. And I know, if I'm gonna have any life any more it's because I'm still willing to fight and die for that inch, because that's what living is, the six inches in front of your face. Now I can't make you do it. You've got to look at the guy next to you, look into his eyes. Now I think ya going to see a guy who will go that inch with you. Your gonna see a guy who will sacrifice himself for this team, because he knows when it comes down to it your gonna do the same for him. That's a team gentlemen, and either, we heal as a team, or we will die as individuals. That's football guys, that's all it is. Now what are you gonna do?"
BLOW: "So in the end, was it worth it? Jesus Christ. How irreparably changed my life has become. It's always the last days of summer and I've been left out in the cold with no door to get back in. I'll grant you I've had more than my share of poignant moments. Life passes most people by when they're busy making grand plans for it. Throughout my lifetime I've left pieces of my heart here and there. And now, there's almost barely enough to stay alive. But I force a smile, knowing that my ambition far exceeded my talent. There are no more white horses or pretty ladies at my door."
AS GOOD AS IT GETS: "I might be the only person on the face of the earth that knows you're the greatest woman on earth. I might be the only one who appreciates how amazing you are in every single thing that you do, and how you are with Spencer, "Spence," and in every single thought that you have, and how you say what you mean, and how you almost always mean something that's all about being straight and good. I think most people miss that about you, and I watch them, wondering how they can watch you bring their food, and clear their tables and never get that they just met the greatest woman alive. And the fact that I get it makes me feel good, about me."
ANGELS IN AMERICA: But still. Still bless me anyway. I want more life. I can't help myself. I do. I've lived through such terrible times and there are people who live through much worse. But you see them living anyway. When they're more spirit than body, more sores than skin, when they're burned and in agony, when flies lay eggs in the corners of the eyes of their children - they live. Death usually has to take life away. I don't know if that's just the animal. I don't know if it's not braver to die, but I recognize the habit; the addiction to being alive. So we live past hope. If I can find hope anywhere, that's it, that's the best I can do. It's so much not enough. It's so inadequate. But still bless me anyway. I want more life. And if he comes back, take him to court. He walked out on us, he oughta pay."
TRAINSPOTTING: "[narrating] Choose Life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers. Choose good health, low cholesterol, and dental insurance. Choose fixed interest mortgage repayments. Choose a starter home. Choose your friends. Choose leisurewear and matching luggage. Choose a three-piece suite on hire purchase in a range of fucking fabrics. Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on Sunday night. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked up brats you spawned to replace yourselves. Choose your future. Choose life... But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose somethin' else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you've got heroin?"
How about:
1. Jason Robards' death bed speech in MAGNOLIA
2. Burl Ives' throwdown in THE BIG COUNTRY
3. Elizabeth Taylor's tirade in WHO'S AFRAID OF VIRGINIA WOOLF?
Damn! How could I forget Ewen McGregor's opening and closing monologues in Trainspotting? Great stuff!
47 comments so far and nobody has mentioned James Earl Jones in Field of dreams:
...The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come...
Jack from Fight Club (along with one of my favourite special effects."Like everyone else, I had become a slave to the IKEA nesting instinct.If I saw something like clever coffee table in the shape of a yin and yang, I had to have it. Like the Johanneshov armchair in the Strinne green stripe pattern...Or the Rislampa wire lamps of environmentally-friendly unbleached paper.Even the Vild hall clock of galvanized steel, resting on the Klipsk shelving unit.I would flip through catalogs and wonder, "What kind of dining set defines me as a person?" We used to read pornography. Now it was the Horchow Collection. No, I don't want Cobalt. Oh, that sounds nice. Apricot. I had it all. Even the glass dishes with tiny bubbles and imperfections, proof they were crafted by the honest, simple, hard-working indigenous peoples of wherever."
A quick scan through shows a few shouts for Glengarry Glen Ross and True Romance, which were the two that instantly sprang to my mind.
For sheer power, though, I'm surprised nobody's pulled out Pacino's "You f**king c**t" rant from near the end of Glengarry, which is almost as awesome as Spacey's perfect doesn't-know-where-to-look reaction. The monologue starts, not with a line, but with the look on Pacino's face as he turns on Spacey. Genius.
Also, don't forget Lemmon's fantastic "Now, I want you... to sign" fishing tale to Pacino about his big sale - the way the camera recoils from that makes it as much a monologue for the cinematographer as for Lemmon himself.
Hell, let's just put the whole Glengarry script on there and pick any 5 from, what, 20?
I love that film. Might have to watch it again. Right now.
Renee Zellweger in Down With Love
Quint's monologue
In no particular order:
Philip Baker Hall's 90 minute rant in Secret Honor;
Peter Seller's comic monologue (actually it's more a routine, with James Mason feeding him sraight lines off of which he can riff on) as a policeman at a police officer's convention in Lolita "Be great for two normal guys to get together and talk about world events, in a normal way." I thought much of his performances in Strangelove, much as I love the film, borrowed from Quilty's various guises.
Richard Pryor, Live in Concert.
Erich Von Stroheim, introducing his strange sad castle and strange sad situation in Grand Illusion.
I don't know if any of you have seen it, but that wonderful monologue in Lav Diaz's Batang West Side, beginning with "shabu (crystal meth) is the salvation of the Philippines..."
Time Bandits:
"It's a good question. Why have I let the Supreme Being keep me here in the Foretress of Ultimate Darkness? ... Look, SHUT UP, I'm speaking rhetorically. I let him keep me here in order to lull him into a false sense of security. When I have the Map, I will be free, and the world will be different, because I have understanding...of digital watches. And soon I shall have understanding of videocassette recorders and car telephones. And when I have understanding of them, I shall have understanding of computers. And when I have understanding of computers, I shall be the Supreme Being! God isn't interested in technology. He knows nothing of the potential of the microchip or the silicon revolution. Look how he spends his time! Forty-three species of parrot! Nipples for men! Slugs!! He created slugs. They can't hear! They can't speak! They can't operate machinery! I mean, are we not in the hands of a lunatic? If I were creating a world, I wouldn't mess about with butterflies and daffodils. I would have started with lasers, eight o'clock, day one!"
True Romance has come up a lot, but there's a great monologue no one has mentioned, an unknown actor (at the time) named James Gandolfini gave this great one about the nature of killing, and it's a killer:
"Now the first time you kill somebody, that's the hardest. I don't give a shit if you're fuckin' Wyatt Earp or Jack the Ripper. Remember that guy in Texas? The guy up in that fuckin' tower that killed all them people? I'll bet you green money that first little black dot he took a bead on, that was the bitch of the bunch. First one is tough, no fuckin' foolin'. The second one... the second one ain't no fuckin' Mardis Gras either, but it's better than the first one 'cause you still feel the same thing, y'know... except it's more diluted, y'know it's... it's better. I threw up on the first one, you believe that? Then the third one... dah, the third one is easy, you level 'em right off. It's no problem. Now... shit... now I do it just to watch their fuckin' expression change."
From the X-Files episode "Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man", a nice little fuck you to another famed monologue:
"Life is like a box of chocolates. A cheap, thoughtless, perfunctory gift that nobody ever asks for. Unreturnable because all you get back is another box of chocolates. So you're stuck with this undefinable whipped mint crap that you mindlessly wolf down when there's nothing else left to eat. Sure, once in a while there's a Peanut Butter Cup or an English Toffee. But they're gone too fast and the taste is... fleeting. So you end up with nothing but broken bits filled with hardened jelly and teeth-shattering nuts. And if you're desperate enough to eat those, all you got left is an empty box... filled with useless brown paper wrappers."
Though it was a bit of a flop in the theaters, David Lynch's Dune really caputerd the spirit of the book. Amongst a lot of good monologue type material is the Baron Harkonnen's rant about taking down his rival, the Duke Atredies. The final line "He'll die before these eyes, and He'll know. . He'll know that it is I, Baron Vladimir Harkonenen that encompasses his doom!'
Delivered with spittle flying from his diseased face, it it one of the great evil character monologues of all time.
How about a different conception of monologue? Instead of many words spoken by one character, how about a word or three spoken by many characters? On behalf of this alternate approach, I offer: "I am Spartacus." Not a perfect movie by any means - hey, Kubrick was the most distressed about this - but a perfect scene; and, I submit a kind of monologue. The kind that can only be collectively delivered. And as such, one voice.
Then - Ben
I hate to be pedantic but the Christopher Walken monologue regarding the watch is from True Romance. Written by Tarantino and directed by Tony Scott.
kevon45uk: Actually, the watch monologue is from Tarantino's Pulp Fiction. The clip is here.
Many great mono's here, and thanks to john wilson, I think, for remembering Brian Cox in 25th Hour. That scene wrecks and humbles me.
I'd add Michael Murphy's great bit at the end of the first or second installment of Tanner '88, about the importance of asking the impertinent question, and who one's favorite Beatle should be. It's shot on video from underneath a glass coffee table as Murphy prowls the room, and convinces his staff he's presidential material. Great acting, great writing (Garry Trudeau), pure Altman. Tremendous.
Didn't see this one above, either: Lee Strasberg in GF 2. If you ask me, Hyman Roth's "This is the business we have chosen" is the perfect bookend and cultural endpoint to Bonasera's shattered idealism which opens GF1.
And finally, shout outs for Harvey Keitel in Smoke--a virtuoso moment in a strong and underrated career--and Tim Roth in Reservoir Dogs (the drug dog story). Both might have been mentioned.
So I'm over a month late here, but just discovered the site.
My favorite monologue comes from John Hughes' "Planes, Trains, and Automobiles." Neal Page (Steve Martin) tears Del Griffith (John Candy) apart. It's hilarious on paper, but onscreen, intercut with Candy's wounded face, it's almost unbearable. I don't even need to look it up, I know it by heart:
"You got a free room, you got a free cab. And someone who'll listen to your boring stories. Didn't you notice on the plane when you started talking, eventually I started reading the vomit bag? I mean, didn't that give you some sort of clue, like "hey, maybe this guy's not enjoying it?" Everything is not an anecdote. You have to discriminate! You choose things that are funny or mildly amusing or interesting. You're a miracle! Your stories have none of that! They aren't even amusing accidentally! "Hey honey, I'd like you to meet Del Griffith, he's got some amusing anecdotes for you. Oh and here's a gun so you can blow your brains out, you'll thank me for it!" I could tolerate any insurance seminar! For days, I could sit there and listen to them go on and on with a big smile on my face. And they'd say "How can you stand it?" And I'd say "Because I've been with Del Griffith. I can take anything..." And you know what they'd say, they'd say "I know what you mean, the shower curtain ring guy...whoa!" It's like being on a date with a Chatty Cathy doll. I expect you to have a little string on your chest that I have to pull out and snap back. Except I wouldn't pull it out and snap it back, you would. ACK! ACK! ACK! ACK! And by the way, you know, when you're telling these little stories of yours? Here's a good idea. Have a point! It makes it so much more interesting for the listener!"
Is a year late too late?
How about Verbal (Kevin Spacey) in The Usual Suspects?
My #1 is still Quint's in Jaws. The second greatest soliloquy of the English language!
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